Monday, November 16, 2009

A Dream is a Wish Your Heart Makes?

I dream on a fairly regular basis. Most mornings I will wake up and be vaguely aware that I had some sort of dream. If my dreams are really scary, they will wake me in the middle of the night, possibly keep me up for hours, and then take days for me to get it out of my head.

Sometimes I will wake up in the middle of the night after having a really good dream. On these nights I usually contemplate writing the events of the dream down, but then talk myself out of it because I am sure I will remember it in the morning because it was just that good. Naturally, once morning rolls around, I don’t remember anything.

This weekend I had a dream that I really would like to forget, but can’t seem to get out of my head. It wasn’t a good dream by any means, but it wasn’t necessarily a bad dream either. It was maybe just a little disturbing. And I really wonder what the hell I was thinking to have produced such an interesting and disturbing dream.

In my dream I was Sarah Palin and I was getting it in the ass from Glenn Beck.

And I was enjoying it, asking him to be rough and begging him to slap my ass.

What I thought was most interesting about the dream was that myself, as Sarah Palin, loved Glenn Beck’s tiny, little penis. Obviously, I have no idea what his penis is actually like, but in my dream it was the size of my index finger and I/Sarah Palin, thought it was awesome.

Oh, and did I mention that I’m a liberal and loathe Sarah Palin and Glenn Beck? Why the hell would I dream about two people I don’t like having butt sex? Oh well. I know I’ll never know, I just have to keep working on getting that scary image out of my head.

NaNoWriMo word count: 23029
Health update: Though I haven’t weighed myself, I have been working out 4-5 times a week and I feel so much better. Leland tells me that I look like I have lost weight, and although I want to believe him, I won’t until I actually see the numbers on the scale. I plan to weight myself Wednesday morning, so hopefully it will be good news.


David Kames said...

In my dream I was Sarah Palin and I was getting it in the ass from Glenn Beck.

I am honestly lost... for... words...

Intense Guy said...

Leland is probably right even if you didn't loose weight - you could have gained a bit of healthy tone. :)

And that is one weird dream - I don't think "disturbing" quite covers it - LOL!

Yikes! I wouldn't want Sarah Palin in my home town let alone in my home ... and something of mine in ... "there". Ugh!!!

Calling Doctor Freud! Needed in Yankeetown Stat! Calling Doctor Freud!

You are really cranking with the words! 23,000 plus!?! WOW!!

Go Yankee Girl GOOOO!!!

Cathy said...

OMG! I'm practically crying right now that was so funny! Palin and Beck are both so dumb. Could Palin make women look any stupider? Could Glenn Beck be any more of a whack job? I'm going to be laughing about this all day:)

Anonymous said...

You should send that to fox news. That's the funniest thing I ever heard about those two!


Samantha said...

What a strange, disturbing dream... I hope I never have one similiar to that! ;)

Sounds like you're doing awesome with the novel writing AND the exercising! Keep it up!

Vodka Logic said...

Liberal or conservative that is a disturbing dream. To be any body else is hard enough... I hope you kept the blue dress for evidence.

Tracy said...

lol, maybe you are moving over to the dark side

yellowdoggranny said...

that was no dream ..that was a screaming nightmare...holy shit!
good luck with the weight proud of you..

Carma Sez said...

been trying to think up something witty to say and failing, I'll stick to congratulating you on sticking to your workout plan. Can't wait to hear how much you've lost.t

Tracie said...

Bwahahahahahaha!!!!! Now I will never forget your dream either.


I SO needed that laugh this morning. But I hope you never have that dream again - how traumatizing!!

Way to go keeping up with your workouts and your writing =)

Stephanie Faris said...

Weird, weird dream!

You're doing well on the workouts and NaNoWriMo. Keep up the good work!


i dreamed last night that i was whitney from the hills and i was dating edward from twilight and that i jumped off a building and got killed and attended my own funeral

but that doesn't beat your dream

Organic Meatbag said...

Ewwwww...I just got the vision of Sarah Palin in her nasally alaskan saying "Ohh ya, babeeee, put it right there in my poop hole, eh??!" *shudder*...thanks Yankee girl...hahahaha!

Meg said...


That's one disturbing dream. Hilarious, but disturbing.

MsTypo said...

This post confirms many things always suspected about Glen Beck. And Sarah Palin for that matter. You are a seer! :p

Mandy said...

Well, that sounds better than Rizzo the Rat (from the Muppet movies) trying to bite off your fingers. That is the last thing I remember dreaming, LOL!

You don't love Sarah Palin? Gosh, she's so funny and fun to make fun of and I'm not even a liberal/democrat. ;-)

Melissa B. said...

Wow. Double-Wow, in fact. I loathe the woman myself, so would hesitate to analyze this. BUT, the Veep Candidate herself is coming to a book-signing in my neck o' the woods. I could print your post out and have her autograph it, if you'd like.

JennyMac said...


And this is CLASSIC!

Michelle@DomesticationoftheSingleGirl said...

i read this when you posted it.

sorry for the lack of commenting. it's very rare that i'm left speechless. ;p

please know that this has popped in my head, randomly, a few times since then and i've had no explanation for my ridiculous bursts of laughter. in PUBLIC, mind you.

you have scarred my brain.

i think i love you.