Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Hump Day Hangover 4


Welcome to my fourth edition of Hump Day Hangover. If you are new to my blog and want to know what this is all about, go here.

By the time Leland gets home from Puerto Rico on Friday, we will be behind our goal by 28. Yep, we will have to continue having sex to stay on top of things, and then have make up sex 28 times. I’m not worried. Leland and I do not have any plans this weekend so I am SURE we will get a good amount of shagging in. Maybe I’ll just tie Leland to the bedposts and leave him there all weekend. Then he will be just waiting there for my pleasure.

Although I was sick last week and had my period, we still made sure to have some sex. My death metal seduction worked, though we had some trouble in the shower. For some reason, we just couldn’t figure out how to do it in the shower. I thought that I could just bend over and Leland could do me from behind, but I failed to realize that Leland is significantly taller than me, and in order for him to do that my ass would somehow have to be higher. I tried standing on my toes but I still wasn’t high enough. I tried putting one leg up, we tried having Leland outside of the shower, Leland tried getting lower. NOTHING WORKED.

What are we doing wrong?

Please help.

40 comments:

jv726 said...

I cant help b/c we have that problem too if we try it that way...If we do succeed its usually not that comfortable for long. Maybe roll up a towel and stand on it? I don't know...Better luck next time on that one :)

Much More Than Mommy said...

Hmmm. It must really depend on the height thing and the shower overall, b/c the shower is one of the easiest places for me and The Husband. Either the first way you mentioned, or uhm... Me up against the wall. But I don't have to get on my tippy toes and he doesn't have to pick me up, so it isn't dangerous.

T!nK said...

try standing ON the sides of the bath tub but be careful you don't wanna fall and bang ur head. (or his haha).

ummm try it on ur knees doggy style that should work no?

or have him pick you up. that could be fun (again, be careful you don't wanna fall)

so what are the "rules" to this little challenge?!

MommyLovesStilettos said...

Shower sex is not comfortable for me. I haven't figured it out either!

JenJen said...

DUDE shower sex is SOOO overrated! It's hard as hell. I'd rather he just throw it in my butt than worry about making it happen in the shower. I always need like an entire tube of lube. HA! Tube of Lube! Another sports team name!

I've tried getting down on all fours before, but that damn tub kills mu knees and I slide all over like a little horny eel. No good.

WhiteSockGirl aka The Fabulous Bitch said...

Ok! Girl, great time to consult your copy of the kama sutra!

Sir Thomas AKA (Winters Reaper) said...

getting behind sounds like fun....

Tracy said...

be careful, water, soap, sex, slick = sticky explanation at the ER, lol

The Step In Mom. . . said...

We have the same issue... now I just kneel on the edge of the bed while he stands up, so we are at the right height.

I have also done it facing each other while sitting on the bathroom sink/vanity and him standing up... that works well also!

Lee the Hot Flash Queen said...

Okay..he needs to be on his knees and you straddle him. There...shower sex.

Dollface said...

awww... im sorry.... I am not sure what is wrong there... I think that it will work when it wants to... you know??? good luck! xxxoo

Ally said...

Oh wow. We just skip it that week. Lame I know.

carma said...

you need a stepstool

Amy said...

28??!!!! That's an intimidating number! Yikes!

the eternal list said...

death metal seduction, phew!

love that HUMP pic, i want to make a poster of that pic and hang it on my wall...

peace

MiMi said...

Uh. Hmm. I'm just thinking that you are gonna be sore after that much make up time.

wines constantly said...

When D and I first bought our condo, we thought, hey! Giant shower! Shower sex!!! Um, yeah, every attempt ended up with us dripping water everywhere, on our way out of the shower into the bedroom. So I have no helpful advice on this matter, other than to maybe start things going in there, and have a lot of towels handy to move the party elsewhere...Good luck!

Vodka Logic said...

If no one here can help you then no one can.

and you could skip a few [don't know why you would want to] if you count orgasms instead of number of acts.

have a fun weekend

Intense Guy said...

Maybe get a cheap step ladder (with rubber feet) from Walmart?

:)

Confessions From A Working Mom said...

Obviously, I have no advice as 8 times in a MONTH is cause for celebration for DH and I... but maybe a weekend getaway to a hotel is an option?

~Elizabeth
Confessions From A Working Mom

SPEAKING FROM THE CRIB said...

oh yankee girl. sex in the shower went out with the 90s for me.

The Girl Next Door Grows Up said...

ROFL! Sorry, no advice here. I am not big on shower sex - too wet!

Lisa Marie said...

im 5'4 , hubs 6'1 in the shower I have to hike up a leg on the soap bar and bend.

Mrsblogalot said...

If I knew, I'd be having sex in the shower right now!

Melissa B. said...

Hmmmmmmm...I'd like to help, but I teach English, not sex ed! :)

leigh said...

Get yourself one of those handicap shower chairs that old people to sit on. He sits down and you get on top.

Works like a charm.

TheSingleGirl said...

Shower sex is not possible. It's just not.

I'm actually LOL-ing remembering some attempts with my man.

He's 6'6". I'm approx 5'4". That may be the root of the problem.

Sarah Beth said...

Can't help with your shower sex predicament, but I read this article today and thought of you:

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,589562,00.html?test=latestnews.

:)

Vivianne's Vista said...

I can't believe I'm putting my two cents in but...I happen to enjoy shower sex. Your back on the shower wall for support, with one leg propped on the bathtub ledge or soap dish. (This requires leg strength. For the both of you!) Now go get busy.

Secretia said...

On your knees he should be able to enter you from behind. Or you know there is always anal penetration, the shower might be just the place to try it.
Don't run out of hot water while you're trying to figure this important problem out.

Secretia

foxy said...

Girl, to be honest, I think the bar is just set too damn high. I don't think anyone could accomplish that goal.

Tracie said...

My husband is 6 ft 4 so don't ask me. You're going to be very busy this weekend.

randomblogette said...

I hate shower sex. It never works for me either. Me 5'2 Hubs 6'. It is too much work!Good luck with the extra 28. I am lucky if I get it more than once a month...I know I am sad.

randomblogette said...

Also...just wanted to let you know that you are my pay it forward blog for CCWA's Pay It Forward day. You need to come and check out my post! I hope that you like it!

heartinhand said...

My hubby is just a few inches taller than I am, so our bits match up pretty well. I still hate doing it in the shower...

Aubrey said...

There is always the idea of him lifting you against the wall. I personally don't care of that though because the tile wall is so damn cold.

JP said...

Yeah that's the only way I know of doing it in the shower... our height difference is.... maybe 6"... so I don't know what the difference is between you two...

Anyway, keep trying... if nothing else at least you're having fun. Something about a hot woman who's wet that's multiplies the sexiness.

RN Mama said...

These are my favorite posts of the week, in all of the blogosphere!

I can't help you with the shower thing. Shawn and I tried it once...he thought he could lift me up and he ended up falling down right on his ass. That was while we were dating, and we've never attempted it again!

aladdinsane12 said...

yeah, the whole shower thing is way overrated. i have never been able to figure it out, either. i always end up getting angry at the water, too.

kristi said...

My hubs won't come near me during that week and that is when I want it the most!