Friday, April 16, 2010

On behalf of Yankee Girl...

Hello all, this is hot husband posting on behalf of my lady. I just wanted to let you know she will be out of commission for a little bit. Here's why...

Yesterday we decided to go to the local park for some exercise. There is a paved walkway that loops around the entire park, so we decided that I would do some running while she did some rollerblading. Everything began uneventfully, although she was having a hard time finding her "wheel legs" after not practicing for over a year. At one point she took a break and I continued running around the park.

After a few loops, I met her back at the car. She looked visibly frustrated. As it turns out, she dropped her key while rollerblading and my keys were locked in the car. I told her to stay put while I jogged around the park looking for the key. Of course this was futile, but I had to try. She was walking the opposite direction and carrying her Rollerblades when we met each other. She borrowed a cell phone and called the police so they could break into our car.

She was walking back towards the car and I told her I'd meet her in a few minutes. She donned her Rollerblades one last time, and then hit a small downhill turn. I didn't see it, but she wiped out and got road rash on the right side of her body. Someone on a bicycle told me and I ran up to find her in a daze. She began to feel dizzy, so we called an ambulance. She was obviously in a lot of pain, so they took her on a stretcher and drove her to the hospital.

After several hours and x-rays, we found out she fractured her pubis (a.k.a. pubic bone) during the fall. Thus, she is experiencing a lot of pain from her groin to inside thigh and down her leg. She spent the night at the hospital and I visited her this morning. She will have to use a wheelchair and walker for the next month and will not be fully healed for 6 weeks. Ouch. I'm definitely going to have to step up and take care of her during the healing process. It will be like taking care of a 78 year old, minus the dementia and incontinence (hopefully).

So, this morning, she asked the orthopedic dude the question that might be on your minds right now. Can she have sex? He said yes (while blushing), but we must be very careful. I, however, am paranoid about any activity involving movement in the pubic area, so I don't think I want to risk it right now. So, we are probably going to have to rethink our strategy if we want to keep up with the 700 challenge.

Given these circumstances, Hump Day Hangover will be suspended for now, at least on her part. I'm definitely going to provide a guest post next week, and I'm sure she will provide an update on her condition as soon as she can. So for now, please provide comments and show her some love.

Thanks for reading everyone. I know your comments definitely put a smile in her day.

-Leland

63 comments:

Wendy said...

Oh, that's a bummer! Tell her to take it easy! She will be missed.

MiMi said...

First, that would hurt like hell and I'm so sorry for her!
Second: How freakin' ironic she broke her PUBIS???

LuLu Lake said...

OMG! Get better soon! We will all miss you lots!

And on a side note, I was wondering if you'd be able to have sex. Now I know :) Be careful! ;)

KarmaPearl said...

Ouuuccccch. That sounds awful. Tell her I'm sending good, healing vibes her way!

Vodka Logic said...

OMG that sounds so painful..give her my best and wish her a speedy recovery.

As for sex I am sure you two can come up with some creative alternative....when she feels better.
xx

Shabbychicdiva said...

Hope she feels better really soon!!! Winona

Kathie @ Just a Happy Housewife said...

oh no! I hope that she heals soon!

The Only Girl said...

OMG - that's terrible! Seeing as how the pubis was ironically involved, I think karma might be too. And that karma is a bitch!

Hope she feels better soon. Poor thing.

MommyLovesStilettos said...

Oh no!!! Get well soon!

Cara Smith said...

That sounds terrible. I hope she feels better soon.

You have certianly made the decision for me not to strap my roller blades back on.

Dollface said...

omg..... i hope you get better soon!!! I cant imagine what that was like. I know this will cause a strain on humpday!! feel better girlie, xxxooo

Squashys Girl said...

Dang Girl!!! that sucks... hope you heal soon :)

Terry said...

Oh Damn...and I just started following her blog the other day...I think it was the 700 challenge that dragged me in ...Damn roller blades!!
good luck to you both! You, especially, being the caregiver...tsk tsk...I hope she's a good patient for you!

Cathy said...

Oh no! Get better Yankee Girl!

Don't be having any crazy sex, let yourself heal first.

Intense Guy said...

Man that really sucks... A nice day turns into a pain in the ass (literally).

Get well soonest Yankee Girl! It will be a contest between you and Shorty!!!

:)

Monique-aka-Surferwife23 said...

Holy Hell! I was already cringing at the road rash, let alone broken pubes. Or pubis. Whatever. I am going to tell everyone that my friend Yankee Girl broke her pubes.

FEEL BETTER!

JenJen said...

I cannot even believe it. I am teleporting my vagina/pubic area to her so she can continue with her plans.....I seriously can't believe it. This is a critical setback in the weight-loss-through-sex process. I even found more condoms to mail. Fuck.

Much More Than Mommy said...

OUCH! I just pulled a muscle there and it hurt more than having babies! I'll be praying for a speedy recovery, and no incontinence! Thank you, Leland, for writing so we would know!

Amy said...

OMG Yankee Girl!! I'm so sorry to hear of this:(

Feel better soon pretty lady.

JP said...

She fell and broke her hip? When did she turn 70?

People made the same joke to me when I developed gout...

Anyway hope she feels better soon and hope you keep your sanity...

I'm Jane said...

I thought for sure that it would be the sex that took her out...not rollerblades!

Here's hoping she's feeling better soon! :(

Elle said...

Oh, OWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWWIE! You're a good husband, Leland, taking care of her and putting the sexin' on hold. It really seems as though the world is conspiring against your 700 challenge!

Yankee Girl, hope you get well soon, hon! Sending healing vibes your way!

Yankee Girl ~ Missy said...

Oh no! Hope you are feeling better soon!

Christiejolu said...

OUCH! I hope she heals quickly, I am cringing just thinking of it!

Taylor-Made Wife said...

Oh hell. You guys are just falling apart. I bet you could have some fun with the wheelcahir though! Get better friend!!

Mandy's Life After 30 said...

Awwww~! What a horrific wipe-out! You poor thing! I know how awful it is going to the hospital, having just made a trip there myself three weeks ago. At least you have a funny story to go with it. Mine was just dehydration. I'm thinking of you. I just put your letter and money in the mail today too~! (before I read this) Instead of using it toward your sex research project, feel free to have a few beers or watch some chick movies on my dollars. Hope you feel better soon! Love and virual hugs, Mandy

hurstburst said...

I'm so sorry! What a strange injury. Thinking about you and hoping you get better soon!

jv726 said...

Oh man! I hope she feels better soon, that really sucks. I hope she is back soon!

RN Mama said...

Oh, what a bummer! That sounds amazingly painful. I think this makes me a bad person, but the whole time I was reading this post all I could think about was "What about the sex? What about the sex!!"

I hope you feel better soon! I will so miss the hump day hangover, but I'm sure I'll find a way to survive;)

P.S. You know how you have the donation thing set up for Shorty? Well, what if we could all donate sex to you so you could reach your 700?

TechnoBabe said...

To go from lost keys to a ride in an ambulance and all the pain, and is out of commission so to speak for awhile. I send her some love and hope she adjusts to the walker quickly and does not begin the dementia because of the walker.

Tracie said...

OMG!!! I hope she heals quickly!

PS Is this a joke? Pubic bone and all.....

StarGazer722 said...

Oh no! Please take care of her so she can get back to us soon! That sounds so painful :(

YELLOWDOG GRANNY said...

personally i think the roller skating fall is a cover story for you two fucking so much you broke her pussy...fess up...

Little Ms Blogger said...

Oh how HORRIBLE!!!! I hope she heals soon and just to worry about healing properly so she can be in full swing...

kristi said...

Oh hellz no. That sux. Another reason why my rollerblades will not be on my body. Damn girl.

Mrsblogalot said...

You poor thing!! Feel better!!! You rest up and we'll see you when you get back. xoxoxm

Sassy Chica said...

ooou wee that sounds painful, so sorry for your accident and injuries.

Great job on the post hot husband!

Yankee girl-I am wishing you a speedy recovery and that ALL heals well!!

Smooches,
Sassy Chica

Michelle@DomesticationoftheSingleGirl said...

oh NO! This is not what I was expecting to read at ALL, I've gotta say.

OUCH!

Girl, we have GOT to do something about this bad luck of yours.

*Quick healing vibes*

:(

I'm sad now.

Dual Mom said...

Take care of yourself girl. I can't believe you broke your pubic bone!!!

heartinhand said...

I Just knew that girl was going to break her crotch! I really thought it would be from the sexcapades though. Take precious care of her Leland!

Sarah Beth said...

Aww, so sad! What a yucky day. :( Hope she's all better soon! And, yes, we were all wondering about the sex!

Jenny said...

Oh man. She visited my blog last week and I wanted to return the visit!

Tell her even though I'm new I'm thinking of her and sending healing thoughts her way!

T!nK said...

OMG!! I hope she feels better soon!! hey other things count as sex no!?

aladdinsane12 said...

huey lewis wasn't the same without you guys! alyson, get better soon! dan and i will have to stop by and hang out soon.

Mrsblogalot said...

LOL!!! Why did I stop with Brownies? I had no idea all I would learn in Girl Scouts!

Hope you are feeling better! xoxooM

Heather said...

Ouch! I hope you feel better soon.

Salt said...

OMG! I am just over here from Tracie's and I'm so sorry to hear about your pubic bone! Wow that sounds terrifically painful.

GET WELL SOON!

By the way, amazing guest post. You had me at "bitch slap". Now I wish I had stayed in Girl Scouts longer...I was terrible at sneaking out and could have learned some valuable lessons!

foxy said...

Oh my freaking gosh, that is HORRIBLE. Poor Yankee Girl!! I can't even imagine how painful that is. WOW.

Please let her know that I'm thinking about her and sending some good thoughts y'alls way.

xoxo

The Random Blogette said...

OMG! How painful! I mean pubic bone...come on! I thought it was painful when I pulled a groin. Leland-you better take good care of her. Keep us updated! Heart you YG!

The Random Blogette said...

I'm back after reading your post at Stir-Fry Awesomeness. Ummm....yeah me and the Girl Scouts did not get along so well. I was in Brownies and then I moved to a new school system. I tried to join the GS troop but the leader's daughter didn't like me so I actually got kicked out of girl scouts. I wish I knew how to bitch slap back then!

Homesick Cajun said...

Ouch!! Tell her McSpicy said to get better soon!

Holly said...

Oh man...that simply sucks. Rollerblades re evil. Hope she is feeling better and the recovery is not too bad (for both of you).

Frugal Vicki said...

Couldn't you just say you needed a break from the whole sex thing? sheesh

McVal said...

I'm so sorry! Tell her we miss her! And Mimi is right... How freakin' ironic!?!
YEOWCH!

Aunt Juicebox said...

Oh no! Poor girl! Wow. She gets the award for worst day ever!

Traci said...

Oh dear. Please send her our best. She will be missed in the bloggy world!

Feel better Yankee Girl!
:-)
Traci

Melissa B. said...

Oh, gracious, what a story! Tell Yankee Girl that Mrs. Scribe says "get well soon." And stay away from that area of the body...for now!

criticalcrass said...

wow. that really, really sucks. i hope she heals well and quickly.

carma said...

Ohhhhh noooooo I sensed trouble as soon as I read "she decided to do some rollerblading." Rest up and feel better soon. I hope the pain has diminished. Sending lots of well wishes your way xxoo

The Blue Zoo said...

Holy crap!! Ouchie!!

Hope she feels better soon!!!

Samantha said...

Oh my gosh, I somehow missed this post... I am so sorry to hear what happened!! I hope you feel better soon, girl!! Here's to a speedy recovery.

It's so ironic that of all the bones in your body, THAT is the one you fractured... Go figure, right?

Adorably Distracted... said...

omg that sounds like it hurts!!! Hope she is feeling better soon!!

Kim said...

OMG! This will teach me to fall behind in my reader! I hope your feeling somewhat better by now! Or at least on your way to healing. I can't even imagine how horrible that had to be!

And while you are the only person I know, that I can think of that has fractured their pubic bone, you are definitely the only person I know who has fractured their pubic bone that still wants to have sex!