Friday, December 18, 2009

New Years Resolutions

Because someone mentioned to me that I might need to put an “Adult Content” warning on my blog, I decided to write a “clean” post. Don’t worry, it won’t last too long!

Here’s my attempt at cleaning up my act:

Like most people, every year I make some new resolutions. I try to make sure they are things I can actually accomplish, and try to keep them more specific than just lose weight. It has been a while since I have actually kept a resolution. The last one I followed through on was the year I decided to read 75 books. During that year I was a reading machine. I limited myself to only 15 chick-lit books. The other 60 had to be something I could learn from. I read a lot of biographies, history, and classics I had never read before. I became quite the know-it-all and I know I got on a lot of nerves.

I decided to read 75 books because I had just graduated college and was afraid of becoming stupid and losing my literary skills. It was a fun and challenging year that culminated in a nose bleed. I was finishing book number 75 and it was December 31. I was reading Cunt by Inga Muscio. No, I am not being dirty again, this was actually a very good, enlightening book that every woman and man should read. Leland read it and he now says he has more cunt-pride than most women. Anyway…Leland and I were in Toronto with our friend Eric for New Year’s Eve and they were sitting in the hotel room, watching me flip pages, getting closer and closer to the end of the book. When I was done, I calmly put the book down and let out a big breath. I was done.

Leland and Eric started celebrating for me, jumping on the bed and high-fiving. Something happened and there was a high-five snafu. Somehow Leland high-fived Eric’s face instead of his hand and Eric got a nose bleed. Always the good sport, he said he did it for me.

This year I have made a few resolutions for myself that if followed through on, should help me reach some personal goals for myself. Yes, of course, I want to lose weight, but I wanted to be more specific. I want to keep writing, but just saying I want to write isn’t enough to keep me in line. And I haven’t read a book in a long time and want to do more of that.

So without further ado, here are my New Years Resolutions:

1. Walk 2010 miles in 2010. On average, most people walk about 1.5 miles a day with just the normal amount of footsteps they take. I have asked Leland to buy me a pedometer for Christmas so I will be able to count every step. To make my goal, I will have to walk 5.5 miles a day. This will most likely help me with my weight loss goal as well.
2. Write 2010 words every week in 2010. That comes out to being 402 words a day, five days a week. NaNoWriMo was awesome because it got me writing, but spitting out 2000 words a day for a month allowed me to spit out 2000 words a day for a month. It was like literary diarrhea. 402 words a day will help me to produce a good amount of writing that should hopefully be worth something.
3. Read 2010 pages every month in 2010. That should come out to be about 4-6 books a month, depending on the length of the book, obviously. This time I am not putting any requirements on what I read, just as long as I am reading. I’m figuring with the other two resolutions, I will probably want some less challenging books to read and I don’t want to set myself up to fail.

So there you have it. Since so many of you seemed to enjoy the first BJ story, please stay tuned. I have one more for you.

I told you the cleanliness would be short lived!

29 comments:

Sassy Chica said...

Interesting resolutions you have for 2010...I will be cheering for you!

Smooches,
Sassy Chica

p.s cant wait for the follow up bj story...

Organic Meatbag said...

Meh, I used to have the content warning on mine too, then I found out that it scared people away because they thought they would open it to find a girl satisfying three midgets or some shit... I wouldn't worry about it...hahshaha

Adorably Distracted... said...

those are such good resolutions!! Mines going to be to start being nicer to hubs. :-( and to be a better wife. I can be so mean sometimes and take advantage of him. I hate this about myself.

heartinhand said...

You say the "C Word." Will you be my new BFF?!

Just Jen said...

I love your list! I'm not sure if I'll be making one this year. I seem to do better with short term goals, like you seem to do, so I might!!

Can't wait for your next dirty blog, and I don't think you need an adult content warning!!

Dollface said...

These are such great and creative things all 2010 themed!! I love the reading books one though.. esp. limiting chic lit, because I know that I go straight to it and miss all the classics... xxxooo

Shell said...

Good luck with your resolutions!

This year, I wanted t read 104 books(2 a week), but I have been stalled out on 97 for a few weeks now. I think it's because I've been reading blogs instead of books!

strugglingwriter said...

Those are good resolutions. I'm probably going to make myself a writing resolution for next year too. We shall see.

Paul

carma said...

If you can stick with no. 1 - what am I saying???? Of course you CAN - you will be super svelte by year's end!!! I admire that you are setting such specific goals. I never set any which is probably why I never accomplish any...

Intense Guy said...

Those are clever resolutions!

I hope you succeed. :)

Beth Dunn said...

That is brilliant! I hope you do all of them. xoxo

SC

ps thx for your kind comment

michelleFFTL said...

good luck! i love how they are all 2010 orientated :)
the unclean stuff is so much fun though, so i wouldn't worry too much about the censor :)

x

skinnybitching said...

good resolutions! good luck with following through and i will be cheering for you!!

Duchess of Tea said...

My darling I wish you and yours all the joy, love, hope, blessings, peace, laughter, miracles, good health and boundless wealth during this holiday season and always.

Love & Hugs
Duchess

Mandy's Life After 30 said...

Great resolutions and I love how specific you made them! Mine were too vague (but allows me some wiggle room ;-) Best of luck to you in reaching your goals. I think you can do it. Even if you do slack off here and there, don't beat yourself up though. Just working toward a goal and having determination is key. I can't wait to hear BJ story #2. ;-)

jennie.newland said...

Those are some cool resolutions! I still havent started christmas yet so I can't worry about New Years yet! Good Luck with everything, and I hope that you accomplish them all! Thanks for dropping by my blog yesterday, hope to hear from you again soon!

YELLOWDOG GRANNY said...

where can i find the cunt..besides my daughter in law that is..
i read up to 7 books a week..

Working Mommy said...

LOL!! Great set of goals you have there...good luck!!

~WM

Melissa said...

Great resolutions! Hopefully, none of these will end with a bloody nose!

Cougar Tales said...

Nice job getting a head start on your NY Resolutions. I have been milling mine around in my head. I love the 75 books. You are awesome!

Secretia said...

You can keep us readers spellbound!

I can't wait for that story...

Secretia

Cathy said...

Very creative resolutions! You can do it!

Also, your fake whining has earned you an award!

WhiteSockGirl said...

Love your resolutions, creative.
I am refusing to do the resolution thing for 2010. I always break them and then I feel like a failure, for like 23 second. But 23 seconds too long.

Stephanie Faris said...

75 books? That's a LOT! I read in my car on audio and regular books but I've found lately I just don't enjoy audiobooks. I can't concentrate on any of them. And I barely have time to read anywhere else...but I squeeze it in as much as possible.

JennyMac said...

Love the list Yankee Girl! And I hope you are 100% successful.

TheSingleGirl said...

First of all. I LOVE biographies. Go on...let Babe Ruth, Dean Martin, Marilyn Monroe, John Wayne, Ty Cobb, Lou Gehrig (you get the picture) come up in a conversation. Bwahaha.

I really like that all of your resolutions center around 2010. Little details like that make me happy.

You're awesome and those miles AND pages (typed OR written) do NOT stand a chance.

LOL at the high-five snafu. ;D

Moooooog35 said...

My New Year's Resolution:

Don't die.

I figured I'd just keep it simple, you know?

kys said...

I like your resolutions. I never make them because there is no way I can stick with anything. Other than my addicitons!

Kim said...

I like your resolutions! They aren't generic and I love how they incorporate the year! Makes me feel like I need to come up with some resolutions myself...and now I'm over it! :P